Tuesday, November 24

Frustrating afternoon again for me and my kids; I just feel like no matter how many times I ask for attention and respect, it seems to in one ear and out the other, for some kids more than others. Mr. Lara is teaching my math class now and I explained to them I should be given as much respect as he is given in math class. The afternoon wasn’t so bad because I helped with 7th grade dancing, then Bible, and then dancing with 5th grade for the last hour. Jacki had told me some more things during the day about being cautious about going to Teguc since this weekend is the elections and things have been going on there. So after school we had a meeting with Mr. Lara about whether or not we were still going to go to Teguc for the weekend. Our embassy advised us not to go and other people weren’t too sure because of other things they’ve heard, but we could each come to a personal decision whether we wanted to go or not. So we had a powwow about the pros and cons of going and not and in the end, LB and I are still going and the other girls (Kirsty, Jacki, Sarah and Julia) decided they felt better staying here.
I just didn’t want to because I had been planning on this weekend for so long, I didn’t want to change my mindset on it; I feel like it’s going to be the thing to carry me through til Christmas. I mean if it had been a group decision and we couldn’t go, I just wouldn’t go and deal with it, but I have a choice. I think the benefits for me outweigh the risks: free lodging and food, a nice thanksgiving dinner, hanging out with friends, being in the city, etc. I understand there are some risks and I will be more cautious about where I go and when I go and who I go with, but either I’m stubborn and I’ve made up my mind I’m going and don’t want to change that or I just trust that Vida Abundante is taking every precaution as they can and we can take every precaution we can and then we just have to trust in God’s protection…maybe that’s naïve or stupid, I don’t know. I wish everyone was going because even though it’s not true, it feels like there’s division in the house and group because the other girls are talking about things they’re going to do instead since they’re staying here. I wish we could all do it together: either all Teguc or all in Gracias, but it’s not working out like that. I hate missing out on stuff, so even though I’m really excited for Teguc and it’ll be great, I’m sad I can’t be here at the same time as well to hang out with the other girls and do what they’ll be doing, too.